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Unlike a lot of women, I’ve always felt so lucky to have a period. Whilst others would feel a sense of dread each month at the thought of possible cramps and mood swings, I would wait in hope that this month would be the month. The month I’d get my period. And whenever it did appear, it’s not an understatement to say that I’d be overjoyed. In fact, I’d probably immediately seek out whoever was in the house so that I could tell them my good news.
I know how scary it can be losing your period for a prolonged period of time, especially as someone who hopes to conceive children in the future. And hearing stories of hope, of people that managed to get their period back after a long time without it, encouraged me not to give up.
Now, I want to make it very clear from the outset that I’m not a doctor or medical professional. I am not in the slightest qualified to give any advice whatsoever, so please bear that in mind when reading this. This post is just meant to give some hope to people who feel lost and maybe point you towards resources & people that might be helpful. If you’re struggling with your menstrual cycle, I’d always recommend seeing your doctor. Because even if they can’t tell you what the cause of the problem is, they might be able to tell you what it isn’t – which is also helpful!
So, how did I go from not having a period to maintaining a regular cycle every single month?
A Bit of Background
I didn’t get my period until I was 16. In fact, I was the last person in my year to get it, and my younger sister got hers before I did. As a teenager, this completely freaked me out. I remember agonising over whether there was something wrong with me, wondering if it would ever turn up. Eventually, to my great delight, it did. But even then it was super sporadic. I never knew when to expect it and often found that I’d skip a month or two.
Looking back, this was probably because I was in a terrible cycle of restricting and binging between the ages of 11 and 20. But at the time I didn’t really put two and two together. Instead I adopted the solution of burying my head deep in the sand, in the hopes that it would sort itself out as I got older.
Contraception
When I started University at 19 years old, I started taking the combined contraceptive pill. About a year later, I came off it and my period was nowhere to be seen. I ended up getting one light period once every 6/7 months or so. And after just over a year of this, I went to a specialist for blood tests & scans.
They originally suspected that I might suffer from PCOS (poly-cystic ovary syndrome). But after running a number of different tests, they concluded that this was probably unlikely. In the end, my doctor told me with a big smile on her face that she had no idea what was wrong with me and that it would probably just re-appear at some point.
I left the final appointment feeling pretty deflated. There must be a reason why this important bodily function wasn’t taking place? And if I didn’t know what was wrong, how was I supposed to fix it?
Increased Calories
Around this time, I started getting more interested in the gym & fuelling my body in order to gain muscle mass. I found out that in order to do this, I needed to eat more food. So I decided to increase my calories to 2,500 per day, in the hopes of getting stronger. Lo and behold, who decides to show her face once the calories come rolling in? None other than my period. And she didn’t just call in once, only to disappear again for another 6 months. Oh no, this time she stuck around like clockwork. I was totally amazed.
A few months later, I found out my mum was ill, which put me under a huge amount of emotional stress and meant that I was no longer focusing on my own body. Sometimes I just wouldn’t feel hungry and I know that I was eating less than the 2,500 calories my body had gotten used to. Once again my period disappeared.
No Period, Now What?
Towards the end of my mum’s illness, I decided to read a book called ‘No Period, Now What?’ by Dr. Nicola J Rinaldi. When I’d previously regained my period, I suspected that it might have been something to do with the increased amount of food I was eating but I wasn’t sure. When I read about hypothalamic amenorrhea, a little light bulb went off in my head – this was me! I felt like someone had written out all the symptoms I was experiencing.
Hypothalamic amenorrhea occurs when poor nutrition or stress alters the hormonal signals to the brain that regulate your period. This often happens to women who restrict their calorie intake, undertake an intense amount of exercise, or are under major psychological stress.
At first, I had some doubts. I’m a healthy weight and, for the most part, always have been. Surely I’d have to be severely underweight for it to affect my menstrual cycle? But Dr. Rinaldi argued that this wasn’t the case, and gave examples similar to my own, of women who restricted their calories for years but weren’t necessarily ‘underweight’.
Putting It to the Test
There was only really one way to find out whether or not it was hypothalamic amenorrhea that was causing me to lose my period, and that was to increase my calories again. So, I did. I increased them to between 2,500 and 3,000 per day. I ate to full satiety and tried not to worry too much about exactly what kinds of food I was putting in my body. Of course, I still ate a lot of healthy foods – because I love them! I ate lots of oats, and fruits, and vegetables. But I also ate more ‘unhealthy’ things than I was used to eating before – chocolate, ice cream, chips. I was much less ‘strict’ on my diet.
And for the second time, when I increased my calories, my period re-appeared. Just a month after I started to eat more, my period was back and resumed a regular cycle.
Exercise
In her book, Rinaldi points out that those who have lost their period should avoid exercise. She cites a number of studies showing that women who stopped exercising greatly increased their chances of getting their period back.
I personally didn’t stop exercising. In fact, I still exercise very frequently. This didn’t seem to have an effect on getting my period back but I know for a lot of people it makes a huge difference.
Weight Gain
Did I gain weight in order to get my period back? Yes. All in all, I gained about 10lbs. As someone who loves health & fitness, this was something I really struggled with initially. I felt like I’d worked so hard to achieve this smaller body and now I was going to throw it all away by eating pints of ice cream & chocolate bars. I also didn’t know for sure that I’d actually get my period back. I could gain weight for nothing!
I can’t imagine how difficult this would be for someone still in the throes of a binge eating disorder (or any eating disorder for that matter). I hadn’t had a binge eating episode in almost 2 years by this point, but it was still a difficult mindset shift to get my head around.
I tried to remind myself to trust the process. And that weight clearly wasn’t always an indicator of health. Because yes, you could see my abs, but my body was seemingly unable to carry out one of its basic functions. I reminded myself over and over again that health isn’t about what my body looks like. It’s about what my body does. So do I actually care about having a healthy body? Or do I just care about having one that other people think is healthy?
Gaining weight to get my period back was a reminder of what’s really important in my life. I want to live a long life and hopefully have children one day. I want to look after the inside of my body and care a little bit less about what it looks like on the outside. What other people think about my body is really none of my business. Now pass me the Ben & Jerry’s.
